I think I might scream the next time someone tells me to take care of myself.

 
DEAR CARALLEL: I’m sixty-five and my partner is seventy-one. We got together later in life and our first 6 years together were like a dream. We bought our perfect little condo, traveled often, and were active as could be.

A bicycle accident a couple of years ago changed things. It sparked a chain of events that left her reliant upon me for just about everything, every day. It hasn’t been an easy journey.

Life isn’t what we expected now. Yet we are still here, trying to make the most of every day and I must say that we’re pretty happy all things considered.

One of the things that really frustrates me is when people tell me to take care of myself. I hear it so often that it makes me want to scream.

I know I need to do that but there’s only so much time in the day. I’ll be grateful for any ideas you can share. – Denise in Albany, NY

 
DEAR DENISE: Your email left me simultaneously smiling and sharing in your frustration. 

I was smiling at the thought of you buying your dream condo, planning and going on trips, and still even after the accident, doing your best to make the most of every day together.

I was shaking my head in shared frustration at the thought of you being told to take care of yourself because I felt the same way when I was caring for my mother. The people saying that meant well, but you put it perfectly. It made me ‘want to scream’ too.

And like you, as frustrating as it was to hear, I knew it was true. But the good news?

We just had a conversation about this very topic last week and think you’ll find it helpful.

✨

You can do this, Denise! 

All the best,

–Jennifer, Carallel Care Advocate

PS – We have these conversations monthly. You can check out the schedule and topics (and register) here.